30 bye-byes

[DOUGHBOYS]

30 Players on 30 teams who should not be with that same team next year. Contracts, money, and personal feelings aside, these teams would be better off with addition by subtraction -



Baltimore- Brian Roberts.

Its been so long since he's played a full season, not even Roberts knows if he can put up numbers anymore. 'Brian's Song II' for Oriole fans, sure to leave them weeping.



Boston- John Lackey

The first syllable in his name describes the speed and movement of his fastball. The throwing up of his arms after he feels he's been wronged on batted balls has to be an irritation to Red Sox Management. It is to me.



New York- AJ Burnett

John Lackey is AJ Burnett lite. Burnett can't even win with the support of the Yankees lineup. Something even Ivan Nova can do.

He gets as many laughs as his mom, Carol



Tampa- BJ Upton

Kids must have been merciless with that name.

Upton plays like he's bored. It might just be him or maybe he needs new surroundings and Management to put a pin under his behind.



Toronto- Kyle Drabek

Lack of command in the AL East. He's destined never to go beyond the fifth inning against the Red Sox or Yankees.

Get something for him now while he still shows promise.



Chicago- Ozzie Guillen

The White Sox need a change. GM's have longer shelf life's, so Guillen goes and Williams stays. I'd love to see how Chicago reacts to a White Sox- Ryne Sandberg hiring.



Cleveland- Matt LaPorta

LaPorta can thrive on a NL team. If rumors of Carlos Santana playing 1b even more next year are true, it effectively pushes LaPorta from a spot in the starting lineup anyway.

Dealing him would be good for both the Indians and LaPorta.



Detroit- Brad Penny

In the past, some teams have wanted to sign Penny as a closer. They knew best.

Penny is no longer a viable starter.



Kansas City- Dayton Moore

Oh c'mon, you knew this was coming.

Moore has built a great minor league system. The city of Omaha thanks him. Problem is, he is the Royals GM, not Omaha's.

The Yankees and Red Sox are thinking Hosmer should be available about the same time Teixeira or AGon near the end for their teams.



Minnesota- Matt Capps

Closers that have lost their jobs think they can close for another team.

A MadCapps comedy.



Anaheim- Vernon Wells

Keeping Wells, Abreu, and Hunter while keeping Bourjos and Trout down won't do.

Wells is that car that looks better on the showroom floor than in actual use.

SoCal' ers are still scratching their heads, wondering why Reagins wanted him.



Oakland- Rich Harden

Billy Beane keeps waiting for him to have that one breakout, injury free year so that he can get top value for him.

It ain't gonna happen.



Seattle- Justin Smoak

I like Smoak. I really do.

But, the Mariners need a Loney/Kotchman type of 1b for their ball park.

Smoak's lack of average and good power could flourish elsewhere.



Texas- Julio Borbon

Too easy. The Rangers already have two leadoff hitters in Kinsler and Andrus. Anybody can hit ninth in that lineup. Endy Chavez and Craig Gentry have proven that.



Atlanta- Derek Lowe

Make room for the youngsters!

Dusty Baker would probably be kookoo for Lowe.



Florida- Leo Nunez

A real closer would be nice for the new ball park. Logan Morrison and Hanley would have been bolder picks. But the Marlins would be throwing out the babies with the bath water.



New York- Jason Bay

Citi is where right handed power hitters go to die. The Mets paid too much for a number five or six hitter in their lineup. Funny, that in a better ballpark and lineup, he could be hitting third or fourth.



Philadelphia- Brad Lidge

He needs a new start for a poorer team. The Marlins, Rockies, or Dodgers could be fits.

A candidate for comeback player of the year in the right situation.



Washington- Jayson Werth

I love what they've done the last couple of years. Overpaying for Werth showed players that the Nats are serious about their future. But, with LaRoche coming back to 1b, moving Morse to left field and Bryce Harper coming soon, the Nats will need a real center fielder, especially to back up the likes of Strasburg and Zimmerman on the mound.





Chicago- Starlin Castro

Reversal here. Castro should be the only one they keep! Everybody else should go.



Cincinnati- Bronson Arroyo

Maybe he should follow in Aaron Harang's footsteps and have a rebirth in San Diego.

His fly balls are too big for Cincy.

Still, a cool first name.



Houston- Wandy Rodriguez

This franchise is hopeless for the length of his contract. Do him a favor and trade for future help.



Milwaukee- Nyjer Morgan

He's a rent a year player. The mother in law who's nice at first, then turns into what she is, the mother in law.



Pittsburgh- Garrett Jones

Jones is hitting .152 vs lefties.

Trade him to a team that is jonesing for a platoon player.



St Louis- Tony LaRussa

Sometimes I think St Louis wins despite Tony LaRussa. Without Albert, the Cardianals could use a fresh approach next year.

It'll be a plum job for the right guy.



Arizona- Stephen Drew

The Diamondbacks have proven they can win without him. Drew is like JJ Hardy, you never know what they'll do.

Whatever he does, let him do it for somebody else.



Colorado- Eric Young Jr.

The Rockies don't like his attitude or work ethic, other than that they love him!

He'll be playing for somebody else next year. But, he'll be a better fantasy player than real baseball player.



Los Angeles- Jonathon Broxton

Too many bad memories in Hollywood.

Like Brad Lidge, a candidate for Comeback player of the year.

It just won't happen with the Dodgers.



San Diego- Will Venable

In the right situation, Venable can flourish. More than likely, that'll never happen in San Diego.

A park with a shorter porch in right field would bring out more Will power.



San Francisco- Aubrey Huff

Put Belt at 1b. It is where he belongs. Huff signed a two year contract during the Giants euphoria of a World Series.

It was like promising a girl free room and board for the next two years in the midst of the best sex you've ever had.

The sex is never that good again and we're left wondering how we could have made that promise.



[ September 16, 2011, 12:38 PM: Message edited by: DOUGHBOYS ]

[Winston's Empire]

Simply Awesome Stuff Dough!!!!



Originally posted by DOUGHBOYS:



San Francisco- Aubrey Huff

Put Belt at 1b. It is where he belongs. Huff signed a two year contract during the Giants euphoria of a World Series.

It was like promising a girl free room and board for the next two years in the midst of the best sex you've ever had.

The sex is never that good again and we're left wondering how we could have made that promise.