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This will be a long post. I apologize in advance. Hopefully, this will be something that others can relate to, or at least get a chuckle out of, and not come across as too self-indulgent (although I fear that it will).

I'm in the office early this morning. For some reason, I woke up early and couldn't fall back to sleep.

Actually, that's a lie. I know exactly why I woke up early and couldn't fall back to sleep. They are two separate reasons.
I woke up early because, despite pushing myself to stay awake until a little past midnight, I went to sleep last night not knowing the outcome of several West Coast games. This "void" haunts me even as I sleep. I've been waking up early most days over the last week or two. I couldn't fall back to sleep because I was too annoyed. Despite the fact that the Angels beat the A's 8-6 last night, I discovered that J.C. Ramirez - and not Andrew Bailey - got the save. What the fuck? A quick Google search. Andrew Bailey is not hurt. He did not pitch the night before. Yet, for some reason, Mike Scioscia decided last night would be a good time to switch closers. Arrrgh!

See, I'm way too "into" my fantasy baseball teams this season, and it's probably not healthy. I'm usually a glass-half-full guy. My wife tells me I often see people and life in general with rose-colored glasses. Yet, even though I'm pleased to see that Khris Davis did homer last night, I'm too pissed about Andrew Bailey not getting the save to fall back to sleep easily. Two overnight developments. One good for me, one bad. Here, the bad outweighs the good. Definitely in a glass-half-empty mood.

Digression #1: I hate Mike Scioscia. He seems like one of those guys that thinks he is always the smartest guy in the room. I just looked up his stats on Baseball Reference. They list him as 6' 2" and 200 pounds. Ha! If he's 200 pounds, I'm Mike Trout. See? I'm bitter this morning. Meanwhile, Mike Scioscia hasn't won a playoff game since 2009. Including this year, the Angels have made the play-offs once in the last seven years (2014) and they were swept in the first round that year. I bet other managers who have gotten fired far more quickly hate Mike Scioscia, too.

Anyway, this fantasy baseball season truly has been a grind. I have 14 NFBC teams (although, thankfully, only four were in leagues with FAAB.) Don't get me wrong; I love it. But, man, I'm looking forward to the end of the season. They say that season-long fantasy baseball is a marathon and I feel like I am down the home stretch and totally out of gas.

Digression #2: So, Greg includes me on a mass e-mail looking for participants in the Post-Season Contest. This feels kind of like asking a marathon runner approaching the end of the race if he wants to go on a quick jog as soon as he crosses the finish line. Still, I love the NFBC and hope the new format is a success even though I'm not a big fan of points-based leagues. Thus, I buy a team. I say to myself that I don't care how I do and that I just want to relax and enjoy the playoffs as a baseball fan, but I suspect that come Monday, I'll spend an inordinate amount of time making and tinkering with my starting lineup.

It just seems that, like real baseball, everything is magnified during the last week of the season. I know that this week's stats count the same as those in Week 1, but, man, things sure do feel different. While most of the leagues I've entered already have been decided, for better or worse, I still have two teams whose eventual outcomes I care deeply about. Lineup decisions that used to take a minute now torture me for much longer periods of time. Last Sunday, I probably spent 20 minutes debating with myself whether to start Ariel Miranda or Tyler Thornburg on one team. (I went with Miranda; I'll know tonight whether that was a good decision or I'm an over-thinking moron.) Even after torturing myself over that decision on Sunday, I probably flipped them in and out of my lineup three or four times on Monday.

My wife tells me not to care so much. She thinks I should just relax and enjoy the season and whatever success I've had. Deep down, I know she's probably right. I'm having a good year, and I will enjoy my success, but not until next week after everything has been decided. I try to explain why, after being a big-but-still-somewhat-normal baseball and fantasy baseball fan all season, I'm suddenly very tense and in need of watching every game. I might as well have been speaking Mandarin.

Digression #3: My wife - God bless her, she's a saint - knows I'm a sports nut. We've been together 31 years and married for 27. She knows me better than I know myself. I once kicked her during a tense Jets game. It was an accident. We were in college. The Jets were playing their rivals, the Miami Dolphins, and Dan Marino and Ken O'Brien were running up and down the field. The Jets wound up winning 51-45 in overtime. At one point in the game, I was sitting and watching the TV intently, and she made the mistake of sitting on the floor right in front of my chair; hence, the accidental kick when the Dolphins scored at some point during the game. It still amazes her that I can remember the score of that game and other sports-related factoids, yet I can't seem to remember to pickup milk on the way home from work even when she calls to remind me. I think it's because my brain can only hold so much information, and that when I prioritize, picking up the milk simply cannot expunge more important stuff.

Anyway, I try to explain to my wife the closeness of certain leagues/races and also mention the money involved. She tries to understand, but clearly doesn't. Yes, winning and the money are nice, but to her, not a big deal. When it comes to sports and the like, she doesn't have a competitive bone in her body. Me, I'm a competitive bastard. I like to win. I never let the kids beat me in Monopoly. If they were going to win, they'd have to earn it. My wife? She hates monopoly. She thinks I'm "over-competitive" if I make people pay the full amount when they land on my property with a hotel on it. She begrudgingly accepts, but does not understand, the depth of my desire to win.

Digression #4: Cue Herm Edwards: "You ... play ... to ... win ... the ... game." The man's a genius. A mediocre football coach, but a genius nonetheless. The essence of sports in six short words.

My wife also says nonsensical things like: "Why don't you just turn the TV off and read a book? You know you can't impact the outcome of the games." Silly woman. Of course I can. You change channels or leave the room at the wrong time, bad things can and do happen. In real life, I'm not at all superstitious. When it comes to sports, I am. I recall having a pitcher starting a baseball game. Things are going OK. Then I hear:

Announcer: "[Insert pitcher's name] has been on quite a roll lately. He hasn't given up a home run in X innings."
Me: "Wait. What? Great! Why don't you shut the fuck ...
TV: "Crack."
Announcer: "Boy, [insert hitter's name] got hold of that one ...."
Me: ... up."

The announcer immediately goes almost to the head of my personal list of most annoying baseball announcers, right behind Tim McCarver. (It would take many more gaffes like the one above to pass Timmy on my list.)

Thus, I find myself second-guessing every lineup decision I make, and watching more baseball than ever. At the same time, this week has been: exciting, frustrating, exhilarating, depressing, nerve-wracking, awesome, tense, fun, and exhausting. I wouldn't have it any other way, but part of me can't wait for it to end. I'm so looking forward to next week, when I really can just sit back and watch baseball with nothing, or very little, on the line. It will be good to relax for a change. On the other hand, I do have that first 50-round e-mail draft coming up. Some folks already are preparing for drafts. Me? I haven't done anything about next year yet. I'm so unprepared for drafting for next season. Maybe I'll start mapping some things out while watching the games next week ....

Mike

Well said and all too true...my story is much shorter...went to the draft...and that's a wrap-see ya next year. Good luck to you as this closes out in true stressful fashion.

GREAT post Mike. And it really hits home about how special our wives are, even when they say "You are supposed to be enjoying this, right?"

Good luck getting to sleep Sunday night...me and the rest of the losers are sleeping very well, thank you!

My wife knows I won't read a book during baseball season. I explain to her that fantasy baseball is a 26-chapter book.
At the end of each chapter (Sunday), there is a test we must pass (FAAB) in order to read the next chapter.
Thankfully, there are a lot of books that come without those @#&##&%7&#^ tests.

Wives do their best to keep us grounded.
They do their best to try and understand.
They do their best.

A few years ago, I stayed up to watch a 16 inning west coast game.
The next morning....

Wife: "You look horrible!"

Dan: "I feel great" (My pitcher got the Save)

Wife: It is just darned silly that you stay up till all hours watching a baseball game!"

Dan: "I'll remember that when you get up at all hours of the night for a shopping sale on Black Friday."

Wives don't understand baseball, but they do understand shopping

There are also things we keep to ourselves that we get excited about.
Our wives would never mention a 2 for 1 sale at Macys, knowing we wouldn't care.
In turn, we wouldn't mention to them that we have three starting pitchers on a fantasy team today.
Or that on this date, Babe Ruth hit his 58th and 59th homers tying his own record, in 1927. Later, hitting number 60.
If mentioning that, we would be scolded for knowing and remembering worthless trivia, but not remembering a friend of our wives first name.

Men get a goofy grin on their face when entering a Major League Park.
Women get the same when entering a new store.
And for the life of us, each will never understand why.

Good luck, Mike.

My feelings right now are very similar, Mike. This season has also been a grind for me. The balance between fun and self induced pressure has shifted pretty noticeably and I already know my roto baseball footprint will be smaller in 2017. We can all relate to agonizing over lineup decisions. I went through a recent stretch where I would have probably done better by pulling nine pitcher names out of a hat randomly. My wife and I drove to Aspen to get some pictures of the changing leaves last week. I ignored baseball all day and finally checked scores at dinner that evening. As expected, one of my pitchers took another 7 earned run shit inside my heart and I felt guilty about letting it affect my mood. Like most of the heavy users on this site, my wife is incredibly indulgent of my hobby and just wants me to be happy. Anyway, good luck to everybody who's battling it out in a tight league down the stretch and the same sentiment to all in the post season contest.

Nice post, Mike. Similar feelings here too. Being in the overall chase has been a grind; exhausting at times. That's mostly because you and Silver have been so unstoppable. Keeping pace has been exhausting, and we finally cracked this week.

I, too, am actually looking forward to watching the playoffs without the same sort of vested interest, and only watching one game at a time rather than pivoting to every big AB/closer appearance/whatever else had the potential to change the standings over the final week.

It's been a heck of a battle, but you've worn me down Mike. No mas.

Tarpon30 wrote:Well said and all too true...my story is much shorter...went to the draft...and that's a wrap-see ya next year. Good luck to you as this closes out in true stressful fashion.

Thanks. I appreciate it. Better luck next season.

Mike

Edwards Kings wrote:GREAT post Mike. And it really hits home about how special our wives are, even when they say "You are supposed to be enjoying this, right?"

Good luck getting to sleep Sunday night...me and the rest of the losers are sleeping very well, thank you!

Thanks, Wayne. Yes, the enjoying part sometimes is hard for others to understand. Quick story: recently, I'm watching eight games at once on the MLB Mix channel (the greatest invention ever for fantasy baseball enthusiasts). I'm cursing at the TV because one of my starters is getting shelled. I said something that sounded like a complaint to my wife who asked me why I was doing this to myself. I said "because I love it" and she looked at me like I had three heads. Part of us must have masochistic tendencies as we definitely have a love/hate/love/hate relationship with this game, which can switch on a dime with the next pitch.

Mike

DOUGHBOYS wrote:My wife knows I won't read a book during baseball season. I explain to her that fantasy baseball is a 26-chapter book.
At the end of each chapter (Sunday), there is a test we must pass (FAAB) in order to read the next chapter.
Thankfully, there are a lot of books that come without those @#&##&%7&#^ tests.

Wives do their best to keep us grounded.
They do their best to try and understand.
They do their best.

A few years ago, I stayed up to watch a 16 inning west coast game.
The next morning....

Wife: "You look horrible!"

Dan: "I feel great" (My pitcher got the Save)

Wife: It is just darned silly that you stay up till all hours watching a baseball game!"

Dan: "I'll remember that when you get up at all hours of the night for a shopping sale on Black Friday."

Wives don't understand baseball, but they do understand shopping

There are also things we keep to ourselves that we get excited about.
Our wives would never mention a 2 for 1 sale at Macys, knowing we wouldn't care.
In turn, we wouldn't mention to them that we have three starting pitchers on a fantasy team today.
Or that on this date, Babe Ruth hit his 58th and 59th homers tying his own record, in 1927. Later, hitting number 60.
If mentioning that, we would be scolded for knowing and remembering worthless trivia, but not remembering a friend of our wives first name.

Men get a goofy grin on their face when entering a Major League Park.
Women get the same when entering a new store.
And for the life of us, each will never understand why.

Good luck, Mike.

Thanks, Dan. Even if your wife does not understand, I do, and so do many others. Actually, a quick thanks to folks who either responded on this board or privately. Nice to know I'm not the only nutcase feeling the way I do.

Quick, somewhat similar story about wives. Mine is extremely patient and understanding, but, like yours, she does not really "get" this hobby/game/obsession/disease. Unlike yours, she is not a big shopper. But, last year, after winning a few bucks playing this game, I wanted to get her something as a gift for putting up with me during baseball season. I had the brilliant idea of getting some furniture for our living room. Sure, we talked about maybe going on an extra vacation, and we may do that one day in the future, but the furniture has a nice perk. Now, whenever she's about ready to kill me for something baseball-related, I say something like, "Isn't that a nice couch? Wow, dear, wasn't it great how fantasy baseball paid for that couch that we use everyday?" She just rolls her eyes, but crisis averted.

In all seriousness, rewarding your wife or significant other when you win a few bucks playing this game is sound advice. They deserve it, and you never know when the banked "brownie points" will come in handy.

Mike

Yah Mule wrote:My feelings right now are very similar, Mike. This season has also been a grind for me. The balance between fun and self induced pressure has shifted pretty noticeably and I already know my roto baseball footprint will be smaller in 2017. We can all relate to agonizing over lineup decisions. I went through a recent stretch where I would have probably done better by pulling nine pitcher names out of a hat randomly. My wife and I drove to Aspen to get some pictures of the changing leaves last week. I ignored baseball all day and finally checked scores at dinner that evening. As expected, one of my pitchers took another 7 earned run shit inside my heart and I felt guilty about letting it affect my mood. Like most of the heavy users on this site, my wife is incredibly indulgent of my hobby and just wants me to be happy. Anyway, good luck to everybody who's battling it out in a tight league down the stretch and the same sentiment to all in the post season contest.

Thanks, Jim. I hear you. We can all go out and do stuff with our wife and families but, come September (or even other months during the season), that urge to pull up scores on your smart phone is tough to resist.

OK, confession time. How many of you have ever gone to the bathroom in a restaurant for the sole purpose of discretely checking scores or stats outside of your wife or significant other's view? And, how many of you have then returned to the table only to be called out by your wife or significant other because she guessed you did exactly that?!

Mike

rmurph3 wrote:Nice post, Mike. Similar feelings here too. Being in the overall chase has been a grind; exhausting at times. That's mostly because you and Silver have been so unstoppable. Keeping pace has been exhausting, and we finally cracked this week.

I, too, am actually looking forward to watching the playoffs without the same sort of vested interest, and only watching one game at a time rather than pivoting to every big AB/closer appearance/whatever else had the potential to change the standings over the final week.

It's been a heck of a battle, but you've worn me down Mike. No mas.

Hi, Ray. Thanks. You've got a great team. Feel like I've been chasing you more than the other way around. That being said, I totally understand the no mas sentiment - kind of how I feel these days regarding Rob Silver's team. Seems like he gains points every freaking day! Oh, well. We'll both just have to try to finish strong, see where the chips fall, and be glad that we were in the running until the final week. Good luck the rest of the way.

Mike

Love this, thank you.

First thing I did--made Nance read it.

Second thing I did--told her I'm winning between 8k and 35k based on what happens this weekend.

Third thing I did---told Nance I'd have steaks grilled by 6pm Sun night and don't expect too much from me until then.

Nance is a good woman.

If you are reading this, you're probably a lucky man.

A

Ando wrote:Love this, thank you.

First thing I did--made Nance read it.

Second thing I did--told her I'm winning between 8k and 35k based on what happens this weekend.

Third thing I did---told Nance I'd have steaks grilled by 6pm Sun night and don't expect too much from me until then.

Nance is a good woman.

If you are reading this, you're probably a lucky man.

A

Thanks. Isn't it amazing that after 160 or so games, the gap between your "high" and "low" outcomes can be so large? There's some great races left to be decided, that's for sure. Good luck as you near the finish line, and, no matter how things turn out, enjoy those steaks tomorrow night.

Mike

Ando wrote:Love this, thank you.

First thing I did--made Nance read it.

Second thing I did--told her I'm winning between 8k and 35k based on what happens this weekend.

Third thing I did---told Nance I'd have steaks grilled by 6pm Sun night and don't expect too much from me until then.

Nance is a good woman.

If you are reading this, you're probably a lucky man.

A

Nance is a good woman & you are a lucky man having her deal with your degenerate pastimes. Sounds to me like she deserves a fancy F-U dinner from all your winnings....if you can just pull a couple W's in the Chicago Main. Good luck, man.

Dearest Wily,

I forgive you for otherwise shiting the bed this year. In an otherwise meaningless game, you stepped up when it mattered most to me. Your fortitude will not otherwise be forgotten any time soon....well, at least until you crap the bed again next time.

Love You Man,

COZ