Fantasy Camp

[DOUGHBOYS]

(These Boards would not let me reply to the old thread of 'Fantasy Camp'...which seems perfect for this episode....)

Let's check in on the kids.......

(The kids are all sleeping under the huge tents provided by the Camp)

"WAKE UP EVERYBODY!"

(The loud voice wakes everyone.)

Navel Lint- "Who are you?"

"I am the Fantasy God. I have come to take all of you on a field trip. I promise to enlighten"

Bama- "What the fuck? How do we know you're not some kind of perv?"

"I am the Fantasy God. I know all. I know that without me, you have no Championship under your belt"

Ultrarunner- "Or without me....Bama has a point, how do we know you're not a predator?"

"I am the fantasy God! You doubt me? Take a look at RotoWorld now!"

Bama- "Hey! My best player just got DL'ed!

Ultrarunner- It's IL'd...not...HEY! My best player just got IL'd too!"

"I am the Fantasy God! Do not doubt me again!"

Bronx Yankees- "Why are you here? Have we done something to displease you?"

"I am the Fantasy God. Today, I am here to enlighten. Everybody get dressed. We are going on a field trip."

DOUGHBOYS- "It's the middle of the night. A field trip? Wait, will there be doughnuts?"

"I am the Fantasy God. This is the best time for such a trip. Your Principal and teachers should not know about this."

Gekko- "Now you're back to sounding a little pervish"

I am the Fantasy God. Check out your latest FAAB bid."

Gekko- "Hey, I only bid $1 on Soria, not $111!"

"I am the Fantasy God. I am only here to enlighten. Do not criticize me. I get more than even. Even Hall of Famers."

Quahogs- "Speaking of the Hall of Fame. I'm in. Yet, CC's Desperados and I don't even warrant a stinking badge of merit on the NFBC site.
How could that be?

"I am the Fantasy God. That is part of which I will enlighten you about."

DOUGHBOYS- "No offense, but do you start every sentence with 'I AM THE FANTASY GOD'?"

"I am the Fantasy God. Look at your FAAB bids."

DOUGHBOYS- "How in the Hell could I lose every single bid by one freakin' dollar!"

"I am the Fantasy God. Do as I say and your fantasy team does not get hurt! Everybody load up into bus outside asap. I will await your arrival."

Baseball Furies-" I hate this guy bossing us around. Nobody is the boss of me!"

bjs2025- "Yeah! Come at me, Bro! I always finish first."

DOUGHBOYS- "Uh huh, I notice you guys are out of ear reach with all the bravado."

bjs2025- "Well yeah, I like coming in first."

Bama- "Holy Shit, Guys, look at these wheels! This bus is brand new! Our Camp bus has two wheels that don't wobble and four windows that work."

"I am the Fantasy God. Everybody get in. And if you think this bus is nice, just wait till reaching our destination!"

(The bus rolls through the gravelly and dirt roads that surround the Camp, until suddenly, the ride is smooth as silk)

JohnP- Where are we? I think I have been here before."

"I am the Fantasy God. We have reached our destination. We are on....THE DARK SIDE."

Yah Mule- "We're not allowed to go here! Are you sure this is ok?"

"I am the Fantasy God. I am here to enlighten. Everybody out."

Rog- "What are these streets made out of? So cool! And there's lights! And what are those space like things in front of that huge palace over there?

(Walking over)

"I am the Fantasy God. These streets are made out of silk. Yours from dirt and rocks. The lights are on every corner. You have no lights.
The space like things are portable pods made for each kid in Camp. The palace is where these kids sleep.
The palace comes with a video room, a gym, a bowling alley....

CC's Desperado's- "Wait, a bowling alley?"

"I am the fantasy God. Do not interrupt me again or I will injure Tulo once more. The palace also comes with wi fi, screens on each wall with updates on late breaking news. Look at the screen on that wall. It is the NFFC message Board. Not one complaint. Almost every thread started by and ended by the principal or teacher. The palace has everything that any kid at Camp could want. The portable pods provide their transportation"

Spinning Seams- "So, these kids are living like the Jetsons and we live like the Flintstones? That is messed up!

"I am the Fantasy God. I have other things to show you. Hop back in the bus.

(They reach their next destination)

"I am the Fantasy God. This is what I want to show you next."

Fourslot40- Is that a Kennedy Compound?

"I am the Fantasy God. No, this is where the Camp's technology is stored. Those three buildings over there house the computers that run the contest.
Over there is the palace for the 99 IT workers. It was 100. Dick died last week.
That floodlight in the sky with the symbol 'G' is flashed straight to GOOGLE it if anything goes awry.
In those three buildings over there are servers and emergency systems, in case something goes wrong.
Nothing has gone wrong here though. Please board the bus again"

Rockitsauce- "Where are we going now? And why did the ride get so bumpy again?"

"I am the Fantasy God. We are leaving the Dark Side and have re-entered your Camp. I will show you things in your Camp that had no interest to you before."

(The bus parks in front of a shack)

"I am the Fantasy God. Here is the computer room for your Camp. The fellow in charge is in back in his sleeping bag."

Wolfpac- "I saw better shacks when I was on 'Survivor!"

Money- "No wonder we have the problems we do! The door is not even closed. Dust is getting in. Is that hay in the loft?

"I am the Fantasy God. That is not a loft. They are building up. It is called..... a platform."
"Get in the bus, I am taking you home."

(The bus and kids arrive back to the tent)

Scoony 32- "Here we are, back in 'Bedrock'."

Rog- "I think I missed GOT...dammit."

Chiznad 21- "My Mom and Dad sent me to the wrong Camp!"

"I am the Fantasy God. I am here to enlighten. I want you kids to know that other kids may have it better than you. They have amenities you will never have in your life. But I am the Fantasy God. I hear you every time and your passion for the game is what propels you, not a portable pod.
Your passion and your love of the game far exceed those of mere mortal men.
This Camp and it's leaders have your best interest at heart.
They offer you a 'Second Chance League' Offer them a second chance... ok,,, a third or fourth or 96th chance.
They want to do what's right and maybe even the ledger compared to the Dark Side. At least. that is my hope.
I didn't mention that they DO have problems of their own on the Dark Side, right?
I mean, a 'team kicker' has been a major concern of theirs for years.
Never mind, bad example, comparing kickers to the site being dead. Never Mind. I get it.
I wish I had the power to make it so, but I must leave it in the hands of the powers that be. The same powers who have streamlined the Dark Side.
Hopefully, they can build your Camp to rival that of the Dark Side!
Oh, and did I mention that the Dark Side gets $100 off for being an 'Early Bird Entrant'?
Sorry. Didn't mean to rub it in even more. I digress.
"Good luck, Kiddo's!"

(The Fantasy God disappears)

Gekko- (waking up) "Shiiiit! I had the craziest dream last night."

Doctor Who- "If it's the same dream I had, we're getting screwed!"

Steel Lugnuts- "At least now I know why my live scoring for Cutline doesn't work."

Money- "And why I did FAAB bids for nothing Sunday night."

ToddZ- 670932769367582298676739762938679287693287698267293867983673298672398672493867867674094

Bjoak- "He says if we all had the same dream, there is a 99 44/100 chance that it was no dream."

bjs2025- "Tech, tech, tech, Nobody ever talks about RotoBoy any more..."

[Doctor Who]

I never know if it is a good thing or bad thing to make an appearance in these Fantasy Camps! Was def a comic book style recap of this last week though!

[DOUGHBOYS]

It's a good thing, Dusty.
I admire that you don't settle for mediocrity!
Thanks for the thought and good luck with your teams.

[Edwards Kings]

I must have pissed of the Fantasy God. Jeff Francoeur is doing color for quite a few Braves games.....