Shallow Thoughts
Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2011 4:53 am
If I'm a fan of any one American League team, I'd want my team to have a lot of early games vs. the Minnesota Twins.
The Twins do not have a scary player in their lineup.
Butera at the bottom of the lineup, instead of Mauer in the middle
Morneau, a punchdrunk fighter
Delmon Young is ribbed for our pleasure.
Cuddyer at 2b, has the feet of Ronald McDonald.
Liriano is getting hit like a sparring partner.
Last night's lineup featured three players hitting higher than .234.
The Twins have nine home runs nearing the end of April. Ryan Braun has nine.
The Twins are also in the bottom tier of stealing a base with just 10. They are the only team in baseball that has not had a runner caught stealing. Which implies one of two things:
They are good at picking times to go or they are not aggressive enough in their running game.
This weekend the Royals get to play the Twins. Thought to be an easy part of the schedule before the season for the Twins, the situation is reversed and the Royals should be favored in all three games. Timing is everything.
I have Miguel Olivo in a few leagues. His m.o (get it? m.o., Miguel Olivo, ah, never mind) is to give pop and occasionally steal a base.
He's been nothing but frustration this year. Except against the Tigers.
Olivo has eight hits vs. the Tigers. 8-15.
Unfortunately, he has seven hits against every other team in April, 7-54.
Somebody ought to hypnotize this guy into believing he is seeing 'Detroit' on every uniform he plays against.
I don't know what my colon looks like. Never seen one. Never want to see one. And, I don't know if Colon with long O's, translates to colon in english But, if I had to imagine what my colon looks like, Bartolo comes as close anything else.
Cleveland fans, remember Tom Candiotti and Greg Swindell?
Those two pitchers were the last Indians to go 4-0 in April. That is, before Masterson and Tomlin. Enjoy.
Jesus Montero had an MRI on his groin and it came up negative. I wouldn't blame Montero for asking doctors to phrase that another way....
Is it hypocritical of Mike Leake to hold runners at first base so they won't steal?
I stopped watching 'Two and a half Men' long ago. A time wasting half hour with 95% of the jokes being sexual innuendo, the easiest jokes in the world. While berating Charlie Sheen last night, a friend challenged me to come up with 10 players names that can be used in one of these jokes. Here they are:
Palmer
Fister
Wood
Johnson
Humber
Dickey
Leake
Loe
Harden
Dyson or Hoover
Now, I know some will question Loe, but, this would be an Asian player who has the first name of Hung.....
Sorry, like I said, too easy....
I know that guys like Ethier, Kemp, Braun, Tulo, and Votto have had great Aprils, but Jered Weaver OWNED April.
Player of the Month.
The Twins do not have a scary player in their lineup.
Butera at the bottom of the lineup, instead of Mauer in the middle
Morneau, a punchdrunk fighter
Delmon Young is ribbed for our pleasure.
Cuddyer at 2b, has the feet of Ronald McDonald.
Liriano is getting hit like a sparring partner.
Last night's lineup featured three players hitting higher than .234.
The Twins have nine home runs nearing the end of April. Ryan Braun has nine.
The Twins are also in the bottom tier of stealing a base with just 10. They are the only team in baseball that has not had a runner caught stealing. Which implies one of two things:
They are good at picking times to go or they are not aggressive enough in their running game.
This weekend the Royals get to play the Twins. Thought to be an easy part of the schedule before the season for the Twins, the situation is reversed and the Royals should be favored in all three games. Timing is everything.
I have Miguel Olivo in a few leagues. His m.o (get it? m.o., Miguel Olivo, ah, never mind) is to give pop and occasionally steal a base.
He's been nothing but frustration this year. Except against the Tigers.
Olivo has eight hits vs. the Tigers. 8-15.
Unfortunately, he has seven hits against every other team in April, 7-54.
Somebody ought to hypnotize this guy into believing he is seeing 'Detroit' on every uniform he plays against.
I don't know what my colon looks like. Never seen one. Never want to see one. And, I don't know if Colon with long O's, translates to colon in english But, if I had to imagine what my colon looks like, Bartolo comes as close anything else.
Cleveland fans, remember Tom Candiotti and Greg Swindell?
Those two pitchers were the last Indians to go 4-0 in April. That is, before Masterson and Tomlin. Enjoy.
Jesus Montero had an MRI on his groin and it came up negative. I wouldn't blame Montero for asking doctors to phrase that another way....
Is it hypocritical of Mike Leake to hold runners at first base so they won't steal?
I stopped watching 'Two and a half Men' long ago. A time wasting half hour with 95% of the jokes being sexual innuendo, the easiest jokes in the world. While berating Charlie Sheen last night, a friend challenged me to come up with 10 players names that can be used in one of these jokes. Here they are:
Palmer
Fister
Wood
Johnson
Humber
Dickey
Leake
Loe
Harden
Dyson or Hoover
Now, I know some will question Loe, but, this would be an Asian player who has the first name of Hung.....
Sorry, like I said, too easy....
I know that guys like Ethier, Kemp, Braun, Tulo, and Votto have had great Aprils, but Jered Weaver OWNED April.
Player of the Month.
