Selfish Salutations

[DOUGHBOYS]

I love/hate this time of year.
Before the NFBC, I looked forward to the World Series as much as any baseball fan. Now, with fantasy becoming more and more of a thought for me, I mourn the passing of a season more than looking at the upcoming World Series.
Personally, I am coming off the worst fantasy year that I've ever had. Not one first place. In any league.
I suck.
The experts say it happens to everybody. They say this because they think a lot of themselves and it happened to them, so they make themselves feel better by telling anybody who'll listen that it happens to everybody.
Experts suck.

When having as bad of year as I've had, even saying 'congratulations' to others is difficult. Purely selfish, really.
When guys like Greg Morgan and Jon Stadtmueller have great years, I am supposed to feel good for them, and I do, because they are wonderful humans.
I could write, "Congratulations! Great year!" and leave it at that and mean it.
BUT....there is that selfish feeling down in my soul that wants to tell ANYBODY that won, "CONGRATULATIONS ASSHOLE!"
I got a 'Congratulations Asshole' once. I cherished that greeting more than others.
It is like a King getting flipped off by one of his subjects. The King knows that the subject wants to be like him, and can't.
It's good to be the King.
So especially to Kings Greg and Jon, and to everybody who won this year, CONGRATULATIONS ASSHOLE!
And I hope you say the same to me next year.