Fantasy Sports and Mother Nature
Posted: Wed Sep 17, 2014 10:00 am
I can only say this here. If I said it in front of common folk, they would only roll their eyes or snicker.
FANTASY SPORTS IS GETTING HARDER AND HARDER!
It used to be as simple as calculating and forecasting statistics pertaining to all players. Numbers were what won Championships.
Sure, there were some unforeseen circumstances. Rain outs, injury, rotation changes, and strange coaching decisions were monkey wrenches. These monkey wrenches plagued us all.
Fast forward to now.
Those monkey wrenches seem like speed bumps compared to the road blocks thrown at us now.
Our game has changed immensely. Now, it is not just about numbers. Not only do we have to measure a players numbers, we have to measure the man behind the numbers.
When it comes to us questioning whether a players numbers are 'earned' or out of a syringe, we are torn.
For instance, I believed last year that Chris Davis was 'cheating'. From a fantasy perspective, there is two trains of thought in drafting him for the next season.
One, there is a chance he could get caught. Having a high choice getting suspended is bad for a fantasy player.
Two, is the chance that he continues 'cheating' and getting high numbers without getting caught. That is good for a fantasy player.
Of course one and two did not happen.
Davis went off his 'outside help'. We did not know this because fantasy players are not privy to the list of players who 'legally cheat. What happened turned out to be even a worse case scenario for fantasy players.
Davis tried playing without his helper. Failed miserably. Then, decided to go outside of his legal help and got suspended.
So, he had a miserable year without his 'stuff', then got suspended when he did use the 'stuff'.
A double whammy for his owners.
FANTASY SPORTS IS GETTING HARDER AND HARDER!
Not only do we have to deal with what players put in their bodies, we have to deal with what players do to other bodies.
In football, Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson are suspended for hurting other bodies.
Other players have done the same, but they're not the fantasy standouts that Rice and Peterson are/were.
If we were to beat our wives or kid, we would still be allowed to play fantasy sports. Public figures are held to a higher regard. But, I'm not really sure why.
For some reason, it outrages the public when a sports hero does something illegal. If it were a kid down the street, nobody pays any mind.
In a sense, the public is Mother Nature and when a sports hero does something wrong, he is caught trying to fool Mother Nature.
Mother Nature does not like getting fooled. We have rooted or celebrated their achievements on the field and, somehow, think they must be the same hero off.
They're not.
So, as fantasy players, not only do we have to decide whether Brett Lawrie has good enough numbers to draft him, we also have to think...
Will he not get injured?
Is he injecting or popping something?
What are the odds of him getting caught?
Is he smart enough to get on the legal list?
Will he harm somebody else?
His own family?
IT'S HARD TO BE A FANTASY PLAYER!
Bring back the days of injury, rain outs, and questionable coaching decisions. These were all ON field happenings. Things, you and I as fantasy players can see.
We can't see players injecting themselves.
We can't see players taking drugs.
We can't see who gets on the 'legal lists' to take these drugs.
We can't see who beats their girlfriend.
We can't see who beats their kids.
But somehow, we as fantasy players, have to take these all into some kind of account.
We now don't stop at measuring numbers, we must also must measure the man behind the numbers.
And to tell the truth, that is impossible.
We don't really know these men. We see them, but don't know them.
They are like our neighbors. We see them, but don't know them. And like when a sports hero does something illegal, we are similarly shocked when our neighbor does the same.
Fantasy players have a cubicle in a vast worldwide office. Our little world is in that cubicle.
Nobody else wants to enter that cubicle. Nobody wants our fantasy cooties.
To us, Adrian Peterson missing games is the same as Percy Harvin not having his touchdown overturned.
Both could result in a fantasy loss. We're not here to judge Peterson. We just know that Peterson has cost us a lot of points that we thought secure. The Harvin mishap also could have turned a win to a loss.
My daughter was annoyed that when told of Wes Welker getting suspended, I asked "How long" instead of "What for".
It's the way our fantasy minds are wired. We can't help it.
While the public judges players like Chris Davis, Ray Rice, Adrian Peterson and others, we have to judge what it does to our teams now and to teams in the future.
It is not a fair scenario for us. We're not here to be a judge. We are here to be an accountant.
We want numbers. We don't want drama.
It is with glee that we ponder what Bryce Harper would do over a full, non-injury season.
That glee would turn to sorrow if Harper were caught next to Pee Wee Herman in a XXX movie theater.
That stuff is for bloggers, gossipers, and especially for the media.
But, we are affected because we know that Harper would be penalized for fooling Mother Nature.
It is getting harder and harder to be a fantasy player, but we're the only ones who care about that side of things.
The rest are just pissed about being fooled.
FANTASY SPORTS IS GETTING HARDER AND HARDER!
It used to be as simple as calculating and forecasting statistics pertaining to all players. Numbers were what won Championships.
Sure, there were some unforeseen circumstances. Rain outs, injury, rotation changes, and strange coaching decisions were monkey wrenches. These monkey wrenches plagued us all.
Fast forward to now.
Those monkey wrenches seem like speed bumps compared to the road blocks thrown at us now.
Our game has changed immensely. Now, it is not just about numbers. Not only do we have to measure a players numbers, we have to measure the man behind the numbers.
When it comes to us questioning whether a players numbers are 'earned' or out of a syringe, we are torn.
For instance, I believed last year that Chris Davis was 'cheating'. From a fantasy perspective, there is two trains of thought in drafting him for the next season.
One, there is a chance he could get caught. Having a high choice getting suspended is bad for a fantasy player.
Two, is the chance that he continues 'cheating' and getting high numbers without getting caught. That is good for a fantasy player.
Of course one and two did not happen.
Davis went off his 'outside help'. We did not know this because fantasy players are not privy to the list of players who 'legally cheat. What happened turned out to be even a worse case scenario for fantasy players.
Davis tried playing without his helper. Failed miserably. Then, decided to go outside of his legal help and got suspended.
So, he had a miserable year without his 'stuff', then got suspended when he did use the 'stuff'.
A double whammy for his owners.
FANTASY SPORTS IS GETTING HARDER AND HARDER!
Not only do we have to deal with what players put in their bodies, we have to deal with what players do to other bodies.
In football, Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson are suspended for hurting other bodies.
Other players have done the same, but they're not the fantasy standouts that Rice and Peterson are/were.
If we were to beat our wives or kid, we would still be allowed to play fantasy sports. Public figures are held to a higher regard. But, I'm not really sure why.
For some reason, it outrages the public when a sports hero does something illegal. If it were a kid down the street, nobody pays any mind.
In a sense, the public is Mother Nature and when a sports hero does something wrong, he is caught trying to fool Mother Nature.
Mother Nature does not like getting fooled. We have rooted or celebrated their achievements on the field and, somehow, think they must be the same hero off.
They're not.
So, as fantasy players, not only do we have to decide whether Brett Lawrie has good enough numbers to draft him, we also have to think...
Will he not get injured?
Is he injecting or popping something?
What are the odds of him getting caught?
Is he smart enough to get on the legal list?
Will he harm somebody else?
His own family?
IT'S HARD TO BE A FANTASY PLAYER!
Bring back the days of injury, rain outs, and questionable coaching decisions. These were all ON field happenings. Things, you and I as fantasy players can see.
We can't see players injecting themselves.
We can't see players taking drugs.
We can't see who gets on the 'legal lists' to take these drugs.
We can't see who beats their girlfriend.
We can't see who beats their kids.
But somehow, we as fantasy players, have to take these all into some kind of account.
We now don't stop at measuring numbers, we must also must measure the man behind the numbers.
And to tell the truth, that is impossible.
We don't really know these men. We see them, but don't know them.
They are like our neighbors. We see them, but don't know them. And like when a sports hero does something illegal, we are similarly shocked when our neighbor does the same.
Fantasy players have a cubicle in a vast worldwide office. Our little world is in that cubicle.
Nobody else wants to enter that cubicle. Nobody wants our fantasy cooties.
To us, Adrian Peterson missing games is the same as Percy Harvin not having his touchdown overturned.
Both could result in a fantasy loss. We're not here to judge Peterson. We just know that Peterson has cost us a lot of points that we thought secure. The Harvin mishap also could have turned a win to a loss.
My daughter was annoyed that when told of Wes Welker getting suspended, I asked "How long" instead of "What for".
It's the way our fantasy minds are wired. We can't help it.
While the public judges players like Chris Davis, Ray Rice, Adrian Peterson and others, we have to judge what it does to our teams now and to teams in the future.
It is not a fair scenario for us. We're not here to be a judge. We are here to be an accountant.
We want numbers. We don't want drama.
It is with glee that we ponder what Bryce Harper would do over a full, non-injury season.
That glee would turn to sorrow if Harper were caught next to Pee Wee Herman in a XXX movie theater.
That stuff is for bloggers, gossipers, and especially for the media.
But, we are affected because we know that Harper would be penalized for fooling Mother Nature.
It is getting harder and harder to be a fantasy player, but we're the only ones who care about that side of things.
The rest are just pissed about being fooled.
