Caveman Baseball

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DOUGHBOYS
Posts: 13088
Joined: Sat Feb 05, 2005 6:00 pm

Caveman Baseball

Post by DOUGHBOYS » Sat Jan 11, 2020 5:56 am

We are in the middle of another era in baseball. We can call this era anything we want...
'The All or Nothing Era'
'Home Run or Bust Era'
'Launch Angle and MPH off the Bat Era'

Anyway, you look at it, we are playing caveman baseball. What is humorous about this era is how pundits are calling this era and those who are in charge, among the 'smartest' that baseball has ever seen.
Nobody called Earl Weaver a genius when touting the three run homer.
Certainly, nobody said Babe Ruth was smart.
Yet, here we are in an analytics age, where everybody is patting themselves on the back by being so smart and going for home runs.

Can I take a second here to pay homage to a passing that we had in baseball last year?
Nobody died. That is, unless counting a wonderful part of baseball.
What passed was PITA.
PITA is Pain in the Ass.
Ichiro was the last PITA in baseball.
Nobody is left to pester teams like Ichiro. He was a menace with a bat in his hands. A bigger menace on the base paths.
Ichiro was a can't miss player. From the time he entered the batters box until he scored.

With Ichiro gone, there is no true PITA left in the game.
We'll still get glimpses of a PITA.
Whit Merrifield and Trea Turner try but really don't succeed.
Really, there is no guy in baseball that we watch from entering a batters box to scoring a run any longer.
Sure, Mike Trout, Ronald Acuna, Christian Yelich, and Cody Bellinger are bona fide stars and can run as well as hit.
But as soon as their at bat is over, so is our interest.
Their running may be a skill, but not must-see tv.
With guys like Maury Wills, Lou Brock, Tim Raines, Rickey Henderson, Vince Coleman, and Ichiro, reaching base was just the beginning.
Now on first, the pitcher was under horrible pressure. Defensive sphincters tightened. The fans became electric.
These players would seemingly say, "I'm stealing second, try to stop me!"
Merrifield and Turner seem to be saying, "I may or may not try to steal second base, I don't know. Let me think about it while I put my oven mitts on."

It all doesn't matter. Speed is now stupid. Brawn is smart.
It takes 30 seconds for a player to hit a home run and trot around the bases.
30 seconds for a pitcher to shrug his shoulders and say, "Damn, bad pitch".
It could take up to 10 minutes for a pitcher to be harried by a PITA.
10 minutes of Hell from batters box to crossing the plate.
Smart guys believe in stress pitches. THOSE were stress pitches.
Somehow though, brawn is smarter.
A 'caught stealing' is an out 'given up' to smart guys. 27 precious outs. To give one away on the basepaths? Not smart!
A strike out, meanwhile, is just fall out. These strike outs are never mentioned as a 'precious out'. Especially when there are 12-15 of them during a game.

These smart folks don't want to talk about Wins, RBI, or even batting average. Nope, other letters are better like ERA PLUS, OPS, and OBP.
To them, a walk isn't the same as a hit, it's better than a hit.
And this pisses me right off.
In trying to be smart, they're stupid.
Look, a batter has to hit to be walked. In other words, a pitcher will always try to throw strikes to a batter who cannot hit.
A batter earns himself walks by being a good hitter and selecting pitches.
Albert Pujols instructs his batting practice pitchers to throw the ball an inch to six inches off the plate during part of the ritual.
Pujols practices these pitches to help his team if the pitcher is trying to pitch around him.
It means more RBI. You know, that stat that smart guys ignore now.
Joey Votto is going to walk and does not practice as Pujols does. Votto takes the opposite tact and disciplines himself to stay in the strike zone.
The smart guy will take Votto every time. Teammates and those who 'get' the game will take Pujols approach.

Smart guys would have loved Adam Dunn.
We only thought of Dunn as a three outcome player.
Now, such a player is revered by these new baseball geniuses.
Last year, Rhys Hoskins had over 300 at bats of three outcomes.
Did you know that he finished second in baseball in drawing walks? Woo hoo for him.
We were disappointed in having him on our fantasy teams.
Smart guys loved him.
THIS, THIS is another way that fantasy baseball veers from the smart guys.
We are not after the same goals.
We want Albert Pujols hitting pitches off the plate in the hopes of RBI.
Albert Pujols and Joey Votto on the basepaths are like tricycles on an interstate. Useless.
Yet, the smart guys will say the walk is optimal. Ugh.

What's the point of this post?
Hell, I don't know. I got pissed off four times while writing it.
Baseball has changed and not for the better.
The GM's come from Harvard. Sabrmetricians come from Yale.
And even though all of them are spouting analytics and now have teams of smart guys and they're all saying smart things to interviewers.
But you know what we really have?
Caveman baseball.
The Babe and Earl Weaver just winked.
On my tombstone-
Wait! I never had the perfect draft!

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