Announcers

[DOUGHBOYS]

Spring training announcers are already getting on my nerves.
I know, I know...they are paid by their teams. They are getting paid to promote their own teams.
At the same time, sounding like an agent for every player gets tiresome.
Here are a few examples...

"His stuff in undeniable! He has been one of the best pitchers in the Major Leagues and he can be again."

"Sometimes, we get so caught up in the results that we don't give that player enough credit for the lack of luck that produced those results."

"I think he is going to have a great year. He has shown that good stuff before, I think it'll happen again."

"He has to pitch in a park and environment that's not favorable to any pitcher"

All these comments were about Shelby Miller.

All the comments could be true except for the first one.
His stuff is deniable and I've never considered Miller one of the best pitchers in baseball.
As fantasy players, results are all that matter.
Miller was unplayable last year and barely draftable in leagues this year.
We don't care about 'his stuff'. We care about the box score.
These broadcasts, of course, cater to the local fan. I get that.
But the spin is Trumpian.

There are some things said by broadcasters that are just so....

A hitter can never have "A great at bat" if hitting the first pitch.

(If hitting a home run, he "Jumped on the first pitch.
Other pitches can never be 'jumped'.)

A right handed pitcher can never be "crafty".

(I thought Kyle Hendricks and Rick Porcello were crafty.
Turns out, they were just 'wily'.)

A left handed pitcher can never be a "Hoss".

(MadBum just gave me the finger.)

Any ball hit to the opposite field can be called "A good piece of hitting". Any pulled ball, simply cannot.

(I'd much rather give credit to Stanton hitting a ball 500 feet as a good piece of hitting rather than a dribbler through the right side beating the shift, but I guess that's just me.)

ANY at bat that lasts nine pitches is" A great at bat".

(Yet, I have never seen a home town batter strike out after nine pitches and be applauded.)

A right handed hitter can never have "A sweet swing"

(Look at a tv screen through a reflection in glass. Right handers become lefties and Voila, they have a sweet swing!
This game of baseball is just a game made for left handed play)

"Speed Never Slumps"

( 'Speed never slumps, meet Peter Bourjos, Billy Burns, Drew Stubbs, Danny Espinoza, Byron Buxton, Craig Gentry, etc)

"He 'uncorks' a wild pitch"

(Just a great verb)

"He's in mid-season form!"

(You mean he is hurting and starting to tire from games played?)


"It's too bad that the team will miss him while he serves a suspension for domestic abuse"

(I guess that does sound better than, "He hits women and was penalized")

And my favorite...

"The ball hit him in the knee and he still had the awareness to throw the runner out"

(WHAT AWARENESS? Even as a Little Leaguer, I've never seen a player still capable of throwing a runner out, NOT try and throw a runner out.
There is no 'awareness' involved. It's just part of the game to still try and get the out)

Do you guys have any favorites?

[skmetz51]

“He really has soft hands.” So that means he’ll catch everything, or he has hands that look like pillows?
“He just doesn’t know the meaning of quit.” Buy him a dictionary.
Steve M/LetsGoMetz

[DOUGHBOYS]

“He just doesn’t know the meaning of quit.” Buy him a dictionary.
Steve M/LetsGoMetz

Classic!

Another one is, "He gives 110 percent"

Heck, if he's capable of giving more than 100 percent, why not 120 percent? A million percent? Infinity percent?

[DOUGHBOYS]

"Went to the well too often"

Do people even have wells any longer?
And what was wrong with going to get water often?

The most exaggerated line....

"He's out by a mile!"

Figure it out. There is only 90 feet that a runner can be 'out by'.

I love the 'bloop hit'.
We never hear the word bloop except in that contest.
Substituting 'duck snort' for bloop?
Genius.

True story-
The minor league Rockies team was holding a session for kids in their teens to meet, greet, and play a little catch with some professional players.
One kid played catch with a player for a few minutes. When through, the player asked the teen if he had any questions.
"Yeah, just one", he said.
He pointed at the 'NO PEPPER ALLOWED' sign on the backstop and asked, "What happens if somebody brings pepper?"

[skmetz51]

Starting pitcher gets hurt in the second inning, and has to leave the game.
As long relief guy comes in and gets ready to warm up, announcer says, “He’ll get all the time he needs.”
If he really needed over a half-hour to get ready, do you think they’d give it to him?

[TOXIC ASSETS]

Spring training announcers are already getting on my nerves.
I know, I know...they are paid by their teams. They are getting paid to promote their own teams.
At the same time, sounding like an agent for every player gets tiresome.
Here are a few examples...

"His stuff in undeniable! He has been one of the best pitchers in the Major Leagues and he can be again."

"Sometimes, we get so caught up in the results that we don't give that player enough credit for the lack of luck that produced those results."

"I think he is going to have a great year. He has shown that good stuff before, I think it'll happen again."

"He has to pitch in a park and environment that's not favorable to any pitcher"

All these comments were about Shelby Miller.

All the comments could be true except for the first one.
His stuff is deniable and I've never considered Miller one of the best pitchers in baseball.
As fantasy players, results are all that matter.
Miller was unplayable last year and barely draftable in leagues this year.
We don't care about 'his stuff'. We care about the box score.
These broadcasts, of course, cater to the local fan. I get that.
But the spin is Trumpian.

There are some things said by broadcasters that are just so....

A hitter can never have "A great at bat" if hitting the first pitch.

(If hitting a home run, he "Jumped on the first pitch.
Other pitches can never be 'jumped'.)

A right handed pitcher can never be "crafty".

(I thought Kyle Hendricks and Rick Porcello were crafty.
Turns out, they were just 'wily'.)

A left handed pitcher can never be a "Hoss".

(MadBum just gave me the finger.)

Any ball hit to the opposite field can be called "A good piece of hitting". Any pulled ball, simply cannot.

(I'd much rather give credit to Stanton hitting a ball 500 feet as a good piece of hitting rather than a dribbler through the right side beating the shift, but I guess that's just me.)

ANY at bat that lasts nine pitches is" A great at bat".

(Yet, I have never seen a home town batter strike out after nine pitches and be applauded.)

A right handed hitter can never have "A sweet swing"

(Look at a tv screen through a reflection in glass. Right handers become lefties and Voila, they have a sweet swing!
This game of baseball is just a game made for left handed play)

"Speed Never Slumps"

( 'Speed never slumps, meet Peter Bourjos, Billy Burns, Drew Stubbs, Danny Espinoza, Byron Buxton, Craig Gentry, etc)

"He 'uncorks' a wild pitch"

(Just a great verb)

"He's in mid-season form!"

(You mean he is hurting and starting to tire from games played?)


"It's too bad that the team will miss him while he serves a suspension for domestic abuse"

(I guess that does sound better than, "He hits women and was penalized")

And my favorite...

"The ball hit him in the knee and he still had the awareness to throw the runner out"

(WHAT AWARENESS? Even as a Little Leaguer, I've never seen a player still capable of throwing a runner out, NOT try and throw a runner out.
There is no 'awareness' involved. It's just part of the game to still try and get the out)

Do you guys have any favorites?

Makes me long for the days of Harry Kalas and Richie Ashburn. Never heard those guys talking BS.